Why Should We Research Grief?
Research into the phenomenon of grief is widespread in our modern society. Before discussing how grief is studied, what do I mean by modern?
The Modern Era
It could be argued that it began when we started communicating on a global scale. This would point to a time in and around the First World War. High literacy rates, mass printing of text and the creation of the telegram and telephones allowed ideas to spread. Concepts were being shared across various cultures and societies. Some sort of consensus was being sought on how the world worked and humanity's role in all of it. This is an ongoing process that is increasing with exponential speed. We are now at the point where most of humanity has the potential to connect and share information almost instantaneously.
Before the Modern Era
I am not suggesting that before WW1 nobody thought about death, loss and grief and its implications. Many philosophers and authors have written about these subjects throughout recorded history. For example, the Roman philosopher Seneca, who was born around 4BC, wrote the book On the Shortness of Life.
Graveyards, ceremonies and monuments are other ways we try to understand death and its consequences. The Pyramids of Giza in Egypt are thought to be 4,500 years old. It is self-evident that those who ordered the building of these structures, were clearly affected by death and its consequences.
What we know as individuals
The death of people we love is a landmark event in life. In many ways, it is the crucible in which our character and life choices are forged. How we react to these deaths and try to live on will affect our future relationships, careers and financial wellbeing. Our emotions place an emphasis on what is important; they give us our priorities.
I sometimes think of emotions as an internal weather system operating within our minds and bodies. When you are feeling very sad, everything appears cold and grey, and you will physically hunch yourself, almost trying to cover up and try not to expose yourself to the cold climate of these feelings. Conversely, if you are happy, the world does seem bright and sunny, and your stance is open to the warmth of these feelings. A happy person looks and sounds different to a sad person.
Grief can shape, distort, expand and diminish these emotions. Anyone in the acute stages of grief (the very beginning) will know this. Before any major loss in my life, I thought I had experienced sadness, misery, anger, hopelessness and loss. I had not understood the depth of these emotions. I was very quickly forced to realise this and discover new dimensions to my feelings. Joy was diminished to a negligible level and the visceral intensity of these emotions remains the most painful expereince of my life .
As I write this, I may be inclined to give myself a metaphorical pat on the back for the lovely analogy I have just created. How wonderful I must be, presenting the world with my thoughts on how emotions are affected by grief. However, using “clever” analogies is a pointless exercise if only 10% of people understand or agree with my description. It may be correct for me, but if it does not help most people understand grief then, ultimately what is its use?
The Study of Grief
This is why the study of grief is important. It allows the formation of a common language to discuss, measure and compare grief reactions. This requires academic research on the level of the individual and society. This, in turn, will inform organisational responses to the process of grieving.
None of us needs an academic study to validate our feelings, but at the very least this type of research can collate the grief symptoms experienced by individuals, societal reactions to grief and its evolution over time. In a future post, I will be reviewing a research paper on grief. Often when reading these academic papers, you feel that the conclusions and explanation of symptoms are purely common sense, but they may not be to everyone. Establishing a baseline that everyone can agrees is the first step in allowing further study and comparsions.
Bringing a level of objectivity to subjective emotions allows us to attempt to answer certain questions such as:
As an individual, how long should we expect to grieve?
Does grief get easier over time?
How long may this be?
What type of emotions and thoughts may we experience?
How can I differentiate between the similar types of negative emotions I am feeling?
Is my grief normal?
The last question is probably the most important question. Until it happened to us personally, we know grief is an unpleasant experience, but not many people are prepared for its depth and length. We need to know what is considered “normal” and when perhaps our grief is starting to overcome us. In turn, this will inform how society views the grieving process and finally how organisations need to respond.
Bereavement and the grief that ensues, is part of the human experience. If we are lucky, we will live to see our parents die at an old age and at the end of a long life we will start to lose siblings and dear friends before we go. None of this experience should be dismissed as trivial matters. It will deeply affect us. If you are unlucky, you may lose a family member well before their time. Certain circumstances will result in a grieving experience that is outside of the normal parameters and is a worthy topic for researchers to try to encapsulate for an appropriate societal response. Simply following any news feed at present demonstrates the need for many societies to deal with grief en masse in the years ahead. This highlights the importance of research in not only understanding grief but also in developing strategies for collective healing and support in times of widespread loss.
I would never claim that humanity can get better at dealing with death and grief, but if we can bring a small amount of relief to those who are suffering; it will have been a worthy enterprise to study grief.