I have written about the need for research in the field of grief in the article ‘Why We Should Research Grief’. Hopefully these studies can inform public policy and allocate resources towards supporting individuals particularly in the acute stages of their grief. I am uncomfortable with broad-brush assumptions being taken from worthwhile research and being scaled up to apply to everything we call grief. It may be churlish to point out that not all losses and therefore grief are the same…but it does need pointing out. I realise that once we bring some relativity to the grief it can feel like we are elevating our lived experience above others. This is not done to diminish other people's suffering. Ultimately it must be recognised that some people’s lived experience in a particular domain is far worse than most. Lived experience is not a competition, and some competitions you really do not want to win (